I am from the Giri tradition. (OK.) The oldest tradition of monkhood in India. (Yes.) Giri. (Giri.) From Patanjali, you know? (OK.) Old, old, old monk tradition, but not official. Just one Indian monk blessed me into the order of Indian Giri tradition, but not like I have a paper or anything. Thirty some years ago. Forty, thirty years ago.
I love America. (They love You too.) I’m just too tired now. If I go there, I have to either marry or do something in order to stay. I’m not American. (You are!) Honorary citizen. (Yes, that means You are.) Many times, but officially you have to be American or married or naturalized or do something to stay in America.
(Oh no. No. Honorary - You are. We can take care of that. Don’t worry. They honor You. That’s an honor for them.) I know, but... (that You are an American citizen and You can come and live there.) I know, but to be… To stay in America, you have to have an official passport. (I’m sure if You decided to come there and stay there, they’re going to make everything ready for You.)
Ah! You think like that? (Of course!) That’s what you think! (Really? I’ll marry You. That’s what people do for love.) Thank you, thank you. Nowadays, you can. Yes. Yes. Nowadays, it’s legal to marry the same sex. No problem. They will question me why I came all the way from Taiwan (Formosa) just to marry you. (No, I can just…or I’ll figure out.) They will think it’s a fake. There are many countries I could stay. Many. America is one that I like. (And You know how everything is, the situation in America I am sure if You could live there, that would be a great help. Actually, all over the world. And I’m sure that all over the world they need You. People, they love You there.)
I know. Tell that to the Taiwanese (Formosan). (Tell to who? Taiwanese [Formosan]? Oh, yes. Sure. Everybody. Everybody loves You.) Tell this to the Aulacese (Vietnamese), to the Taiwanese (Formosan), to the Mongolians, to the Koreans, to the... etc. (Yes. I know.) There is a prediction that I should stay in Taiwan (Formosa), so I have a good excuse to stay here. (I see.) Anybody want something? Oh, careful.
(Please, Master. We are here to request You to come to India.) What? I know the... The Mongolians say the same, the Koreans say the same, the Chinese say the same, the Aulacese (Vietnamese)... Oh, they keep pressuring me, pressuring me all the time. (But India really wants You.) I love India. Believe it. (Yes.) Believe it or not. I love India.
Sometimes I still think about that. (Oh, You should. You should make it a future tense.) How do I stay there? (We’ll arrange, Master, if You come.) You can arrange? (We have three Centers there.) Oh, I can go there and work for you, right? (Yes.) A working permit, right? (Yes.) Good idea, otherwise, I don’t need. I just shave my head or grow a beard and wear a saffron (robe) and I just go anywhere, nobody checks, nothing. In India, they don’t check you. If you are a sadhu, they don’t check. (Yes.) (Yes.) Good idea. (Thank You. Thank You, Master.) I forgot that.
If I come, I just tell you to prepare me a few saffron robes and then that’s it. I stay anywhere, nobody asks you anything. Right? (Yes.) In India, if the sadhu doesn’t do anything, they never ask for your passport. Sadhus don’t have any passport. They have only a staff, a jug for water, that’s all. (Now everything has changed, Master. Now, everything has changed, Master.) Oh, yeah? (Yes, really.) In India, a monk has to have a passport? (Yes.) (Has to have everything now, yes.) Have to have a house? (Yes.) I am a Hindu monk also. Yeah! (OK.)
I am from the Giri tradition. (OK.) The oldest tradition of monkhood in India. (Yes.) Giri. (Giri.) From Patanjali, you know? (OK.) Old, old, old monk tradition, but not official. Just one Indian monk blessed me into the order of Indian Giri tradition, but not like I have a paper or anything. Thirty some years ago. Forty, thirty years ago. (OK. That’s very good, Master.)
I am a Hindu monk also. I am also a Tibetan monk, also a Chinese monk. What a monk! That’s why I cannot wear any monk’s robe because I am all mixed.
Are you OK? Do you need anything else? Chamomile tea? No? Is the chamomile tea ready? (Master, we can’t find the chamomile tea now.) Is it available outside? (A guard just went out looking for it. He hasn’t come back yet.) They say they’re short of chamomile, so I told them to go out and buy some outside… (We only have osmanthus tea. Master, is osmanthus tea OK?) It’s not the same. (It’s not the same?)
You eat some more? You want some more food? Here, that’s all I have. Rice? Three. Looks like you could eat some more. Today, the food is very little. I don’t know why. Thank you. Vegan American cheese! Catch! For sale. What’s this? (This is water.) What’s this? (This is warm water. This is [non-alcoholic] cocktail, blueberry cocktail, which is Sprite with blueberry.)
You guys don’t have? No? Don’t have? Too bad. Not bad. But I don’t know how you drink. Come. Help yourself. You want some more of this? No? Oh, this is (vegan) curry, right? Did you have (vegan) curry? Is that (vegan) curry? Curry. (Can I give it to the monks to share?) Why? Did they want it? OK, sure! I didn’t know they want it.
I didn’t know you want it. I only give it to them, kids in our family. I don’t dare give it to other people. There is more, if you want it. Yeah, monks. I said, I only give to my family kids. Outside, I don’t dare. But they want it, so I say, “OK, take it.” Like not respectful. At-home kids, I don’t care. I throw anything, they eat. Especially she always sits next to me. And anything she likes, anything. She never says, “No, Master. I don’t like that.” Or “No, I am too full.” No matter what, always! They always laugh at her. I say, “Well, she likes it. Why don’t you guys do the same?” Yeah. Envy for nothing.
What’s this? (Eggplant.) Thank you. It’s delicious! Wow! (Sweet and sour vegan pork ribs.) Delicious. Thank you. Do you want it? You want? (Thank You, Master.) Wow! That’s a lot. Thank you. OK? The monks are like these kids, even ask for my things. I don’t dare to give them, because I’ve taken a bite. It’s OK for my kids; at home they eat whatever I throw at them.
Wow! What is that? ([Vegan] Apple pie.) (Vegan) Apple pie! Wow! Are you here? Come. Wow! Oh, wow, wow, wow! Here. For you. My hand is clean. (Thank You, Master.) She’s come back already. It’s for you only. This is not bad. You guys want this? (This is gelidium jelly.) Oh, thank you. No, I think you have enough. This is for the kitchen. (For the kitchen.) For the kitchen. (OK. Thank You.)